Feeling Lost in Life: A Perspective Invitation & Powerful Support

Self Discovery, Self Improvement, Self Love, Wellness

If we could describe your feeling lost in life, I bet it would feel like you’re near the edge. The pavement has ended. Maybe there is a cliff, a stop sign. No matter what is there, it’s a drop in your stomach—the feeling of being lost.

Most of our biology is programmed to believe that being lost is associated with death, and for some and many humans, it still may be, and I name that with humility and gentleness. But to most of us, it is a place in our biology that takes us back to a memory: “This place I’m at right now is unknown.”

Feeling lost in life can feel terrifying, but what if you named it and chose to name it differently?

We can name our feelings: fear, fright, worry, concern, uncertainty, and loneliness. We can name our sensations: a pit in our stomach, an ache in our chest, and shaking in our bones.

But what if we also let feeling lost in life be something else: a beginning?

What if feeling lost in life was a beginning?

Let’s pause there.

Rewind.

Breathe a deep breath.

Sigh.

Feeling lost in life may be calling you to find a new way, somehow, and the direction is yours so beautifully to take.

Hi Darlin’, I’m Lumalia, a beauty hunter, movement and meditation guide, self-care advocate, author, photographer, and explorer here at Celebrate Again. I’ve been lost often. I’d honestly describe most of my life as lost, and I say that with a beautiful badge of honor. WTF? I know it’s a bit odd, but let me explain.

(Photos from this blog post are from a self love retreat and photography session with me; contact me to book yours)

This article may contain affiliate / compensated links. For full information, please see our disclaimer here.

Why Feeling Lost in Life Is Normal

Feeling lost in life is very normal. In fact, it’s odd or surprising to me how many people don’t outright name it, which is why I’m here, always ready to be honest with you and tell you the truth.

As we grow older, we often feel we must know a direction. Throughout our later childhood, we’re asked, “What do you want to do with your life?” I hope we continually remember to never really grow up, to keep our childlike wonder and play, and say, “Go discover, go find out; I’m in process.”

What if we normalized being in process (or what we previously named as feeling lost in life)? To not always label ourselves as our careers, or the thing we are doing, but remember we are more than what we do with our time, we are multidimensional beings, we are more than what we do, and isn’t that a freaking relief? As much as Western culture wants us to be able to fit ourselves onto an 8×11/A4 paper, a resume, and a profile description, we really cannot be made to be so small, and it’s, I dare say, devastating; we keep asking ourselves to be.

So what if instead of saying it’s a bad thing to be lost, we rebrand it as a beginning, an opportunity to try out something completely new, or a new aspect?

Ready for some guidance, start with my 30 day self care challenge.

The Beauty of Feeling Lost in Life and it’s Meaning

I was 27, I was sick and bedridden, unable to care for my two-year-old daughter; my wedding photographer career closed because I could no longer hold a camera. To say I was lost was an understatement. Everything I’d known got stripped away from me. It would have been so hard to hear then, but now I can see it was the beginning of my becoming who I am. Being lost in life was the space I needed to heal so many wounds deeply, so many deep emotional issues that had I not been forced to slow down, pause, get A LOT of support from friends, family, therapists, and physicians, I wouldn’t have been able to function in life the way I do now. (More of my story in my memoir Blooming Upside Down)

But at the place of feeling lost, not having a career I loved anymore, I began to let myself play. I took up yoga, the only place I could move without getting sick. I started meditation and discovered my imagination for the first time since I was a child. It was slow and messy, but it was a beautiful beginning.

Read more of my journey in my book that you can pick up like a coffee table book full of real life inspiring stories.

Feeling Lost in Life Calls You to Be Creative

If you’re feeling lost in life, you might feel like, well, I’m not that creative, so now what? But you’re human; you are nothing but pure creation. The very fact that you of all the cells that could be made, made who you are today, still inside of you, keeping you alive, your heart beating, your breath going, alive on this spinning rock in the middle of this wild space we still cannot even see the end of. It’s wild we’re alive. It’s wild that we are made. And that wonder, that amazement can take you into this truth that is waiting to be birthed in you.

Every time I hit a new edge in my life, share a new idea, or create something new, I always hit this edge of freak out of like, “WTF am I doing?” but it’s when I’m shot there I’m learning, being reminded just like you are that it’s here is where all the fun begins.

When you are feeling lost in a career, feeling lost after a breakup, here I am once again feeling lost, wondering what to do when feeling lost; it’s time to get honest. Ask yourself if this is your one precious life, and how would you want to live it in a way that honors your worthiness and others’ worthiness? What would you like to do?

Many of us may not have an answer, and some of us know exactly what we want to do and need a permission slip to do it.

So here it is. This is your SIGN to DO THE THING.

Or this is your sign to begin asking, being honest, what could I do right now if I could make my life unforgettable?

For me, it’s always about being in nature, writing, sharing, being in the community, and being with my family.

Sometimes, we hit the edge of feeling lost, and it’s just because we are stretching ourselves into something we’ve never done before. That’s why I suggest letting it be a beautiful, gentle beginning.

Ready for some guidance? Start with my 30 day self care challenge.

What to Do When You Feel Lost in Life: Practice the Art of Noticing

My daughter and I were walking to a new park with a group of mostly adults, rolling by with her scooter glittering with each turn of the wheel. I paused to touch the rosemary, admire the blooming dogwood flowers, and stand underneath the tree I can’t name as its petals snowed on our heads. Quickly, the group journeyed ahead of us without a care, as we were now a block behind them.

As my nose was in yet another flower, I told Olea, “I forget how I go on walks; it is very odd compared to others.”

“I know, mom. I learned that we went on walks every day when we lived by Mt Tabor.”

Often, I find myself in this place, even in a gathering of people who have careers out of healing and spirituality. I’m the one stopping, pausing to take it all in. I don’t want to miss a thing. I want every cell in my body to remember this moment. It’s why I love photography and writing; you get to return to moments over and over again; maybe that’s why I also too get stuck in my trauma, sometimes the memories can be addictive. Oph that one could hit wrong or hard depending on the ears, so the trash can it if it feels wrong.

When we hit places where we feel lost, I think of this: We’re so used to knowing our destination and staying focused on going there. But I think that’s the gift of many of us who like to be a bit squirrely sometimes; we pause to notice beautiful things often. The journey becomes the joy.

This is the root of peace, happiness, and bliss in life, remembering that and finding it even in the suffering and challenging moments.

There is always something stunning waiting to take your breath away if you get very practiced at paying attention to it; our biology is literally built to follow this.

When we practice noticing, we’ll get better at noticing. So why not see the wonderful moments as often as you can, cherish them with slow walks and meandering, sometimes racing to be the first one to stand under a blooming tree, and imagine the petals that fell today to kiss your cheek? It’s a main character’s kind of life, the one we all deserve to have when it costs no one anything but their most precious commodity, their attention.

On those edges of something ending is something to discover, something waiting to enter as you give space to slow down and tune your attention to what could be and where today you may want to pause and let the beauty of any kind astound you.

Find where you are in yourself awareness journey with my free roadmaps by taking my self awareness quiz.

10 Practical Steps of What to Do When Feeling Lost in Life

Sometimes, we need some tenderness when we feel lost in life, so here are ten ideas of things you can do right now or very soon for yourself to be gentle, to let this be a new beginning, to be reminded you are enough, you are worthy, and you belong. Try these to get to know yourself again, to come back home to yourself, to find God in you when you feel lost.

Step 1 Ask for A Hug

Hugs are a great way to help our body remember we are safe. Ask for a hug from a friend, a beloved, or a family member, or if you want to join the tree-hugging club with me, try it out. Oak trees are safe to be less splintery.

Bonus: Let your back rest against a tree. The back of the body loves to be held and rest this way.

Also, I highly recommend lying flat on the ground or floor and remembering gravity; this earth is holding you, and isn’t that stunning? This GIANT place is holding YOU.

Step 2 Give Yourself a Peep talk

Give yourself a peep talk. When we hit new edges of the unknown like we do when we feel lost, we sometimes need a good ole recap of our storyline.

This is a great time to:

make a list
look through old photos
achievements
or whatever feels good

Here take time to see how much you have done or experienced in this life this far.

Look at who you’ve been, your passions, your character.

Let it be simple, too.

Did you feed yourself today or drink water? Way to go!

Sometimes, we need to return to toddlerhood with ourselves and remember it is not weird to cheer a little kiddo on for learning to walk.

When we’re at the beginning of anything, we’re learning to walk metaphorically. So cheer yourself on.

You could also ask some trusted friends/family to pip in too about how far you’ve come in life.

Step 3 Get Out in Nature

Get out in nature. Turn off the devices and the to-dos and just let yourself forest bathe.

Yes! It’s a thing, and it’s powerful.

Bonus: If you want to nerd out about the research behind why nature is important to us as humans, check out this book: The Nature Fix)

Step 4 Write Yourself a Love Letter

Write yourself a love letter using this as your guide.

Imagine that you are five, ten, or twenty years from now.
Imagine you have everything you could have ever asked for, and everything works out for you; what would you go back and say to yourself right now
How would you speak to them?

OR try writing yourself a letter like you are talking to a little kid learning to play a new sport and reminding them it takes endurance, practice, and belief in themselves.

Hell, you may realize you love writing like I did (doing something like this is precisely how I started to write my first book, Blooming Upside Down.)

Step 5 Dance

Dancing cures everything, most of the time. Put on a song that makes you feel super badass. I Am Woman by Emmy Meli is good if you identify as a woman. Even if you don’t believe them right now, even if they feel like BS, let the words and melodies hit your cells; they do change us more than we realize. It’s why I love being human. We are absolutely so beautifully permeable.

Step 6 Meditate

I know everyone and their brother recommends meditation. I resisted it most of my life because I found it boring that was until I found Kindred.

However thinking of meditation like practicing a sport. It’s learning to train your mind from focusing on worry and fear on to an intention you desire. It’s extremely important work in our human evolution.

The best part it doesn’t have to be boring.

TRY this Meditation instead: Kindrêd If you love movement and want to try meditation more but struggle to sit still and “clear your mind,” this practice is for you. (I would know because I was/ep am one of those people.)

Try my Intro to Kindred class here, pay what you can.

If you’re on the spectrum of loving a good time to chill then you’ll love Yoga Nidra.

It is the juiciest and easiest meditation I’ve ever done. You do it lying down; yep, it’s yoga napping but meditation, so you win at ALL of life.

Try out a Yoga Nidra class with me right now or bookmark for later.

Step 7 Create for the Fun of It

Take up pottery and join the following million people who have tried it! LOL, But seriously, I hear it’s incredible.

Go color just because.

Draw something even if you’re horrific.

Go outside, grab some random things from nature, like fallen leaves, flowers, and dandelions, and smash them on a paper with some tape, and see what happens.

Step 8 Clean or Organize

Sometimes, cleaning our spaces and clearing out our closets to only have clothing we love can be refreshing. Keep the old clothes in a box for a few days just in case you need to have a freakout moment and not throw away your favorite childhood sweatshirt from your mom. Or organize, re-arrange your furniture, or declutter. These little things can clear space from our minds and environments to feel a sense of grounding and safety, which we need when we feel lost.

Step 9 Do Anything That Makes You Feel Safe

Cozy up with your favorite book or movie, and drink some of your favorite tea. Sometimes distractions are helpful when we’ve been deep in high emotions for a long time. And I will never turn down the sacredness of a good bed.

Step 10 Let yourself feel your emotions.

I’m a big fan of a good cry session. Grab a journal and write out everything you think; burn it safely if you need to, but let it out.

Reach out to a therapist you love talking to if you hit any deep edges and need more support.

There is always support if you want it, and you can always try out multiple therapists, too. (Speaking from profound advice here, I’ve had a few bad therapists and some incredible therapists.)

Get support in all of this by finding where you are in your awareness journey with my free roadmaps by taking my self-awareness quiz.

Above all, I hope you are gentle with yourself. Let yourself be lost, knowing it’s just the beginning of something beautiful. Let it be a birth, a chance to get curious about who you could become and what you could do with your life. Maybe let yourself be a little delusional until one day you discover it could all actually be beautiful.

At least, that’s what I’m learning: to let life surprise me, to find as many moments of wonderment as I can each day, no matter the depth of pain or memories my body is holding on to. The thing I want most out of this life is to feel joy.

Books to Read When Feeling Lost in Life

For more support right now, check out some of these books from Bookshop.org that supports local bookstores with your book purchase.

Blooming Upside Down
- My book on healing with chronic illnesses, motherhood, trauma bonding, and generational trauma healing
Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear
- A powerful book to help you find your everyday magic
Poems and Peonies
- stunning poetry that touches on life, female empowerment, motherhood, and divorce
Wolf Mother
- beautiful poetry on life, motherhood, and female empowerment
Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail
- A memoir about self-discovery and healing through a solo hike on the PCT.
Finding Your Own North Star: Claiming the Life You Were Meant to Live –
- Practical advice for navigating life’s changes and finding your true path.

Self Paced Discovery Road Maps

Self Awareness Roadmaps:

– All Free

Customized roadmaps that include self-improvement lessons, nervous system regulation classes (yoga and meditations), journal prompts, and experiences to deepend your awareness.

Begin with my self-awareness quiz to find your roadmap. Then set your calendar for times to continue your journey.