Lumalia’s debut Memoir, Blooming Upside Down, is out now!

"I see you trying to filter everything through everyone else’s body, hoping then maybe you’ll know what you truly want. Wrap your arms around her darling, hold us tight, and kiss her forehead because that’s all she knows. " part of letter from Lumalia's idea on how to stop the inner critic

How to Stop the Inner Critic: Let it All Rupture

We all have this inner critic in us, but how do we stop the inner critic? We have to love them and view them as a piece of us that was doing their best to get us to today. 

Hi love, I’m Lumalia, author, and explorer of life. I am sharing a letter I wrote to my inner critic. I’m realizing it isn’t my inner voice made by my family, but this piece of me from my cultural upbringing made me really judgmental. 

But here is the thing about inner critics: they kept us safe until they caused us more harm today. 

"I see you trying to filter everything through everyone else’s body, hoping then maybe you’ll know what you truly want. Wrap your arms around her darling, hold us tight, and kiss her forehead because that’s all she knows. " part of letter from Lumalia's idea on how to stop the inner critic

how to stop your inner critic: Go Love them

What would it look like for you to go love your inner critic? 

For me, it’s writing her love letters, disarming her, and saying thank you for keeping me safe from everything I was afraid of. The judgment keeps us safe: from touching the hot fire, engaging with a person who seems violent, or walking too close to the cliff. Judgment is helpful until it’s not. 

And that is where we get to go in and say, “Thank you, but I have it from here.” 

Judgement gets replaced with tender discernment and just like a parent to a child afraid of getting back on the bike they keep hurting themselves on they say with the trust of the joy of biking “it gets better, keep trying my love, you’re doing great.” And with that love, that confidence building, the child gets back on the bike with their scuffed-up knees and learns what it feels like to fly. 

Go let yourself fly

Inspiration on how to stop your inner critic: My letter

I wrote this letter to love my inner critic, and maybe it will inspire you to go do that right now, too, or at least begin a different inner dialogue. 

I see you trying to filter everything through everyone else’s body, hoping then maybe you’ll know what you truly want. 

Wrap your arms around her darling, hold us tight, and kiss her forehead because that’s all she knows. 

She is forced to feel desire because of someone’s brokenness. Please go gentle with her, she’s doing her best, and I know you hate that phrase because it says he was doing his best too, and, indeed, sometimes our best is really fucking harmful.  

We’re messy spaghetti, staining all the white shirts, the striped pillow cushions you want to buy from Ikea for the kitchen chairs, but you don’t because, you know, those are not for us who weren’t not sure the last time we mopped our floors or how old that rice stuck to your sock is from.  You want it all to be perfect, stunning, and beautiful, and you can have that. 

Still, you’ve exchanged it for just being, to leave the kitchen, leave the dishes to look in their eyes, to dance in the living room,
to have extra long hugs: 

the kind where she backs up and wants to run into your arms from across the living room. 

We just want that type of collision.

Running full stop, isn’t it how stars are made? It’s how life is made, too.

 Let’s celebrate the collision, 

the smash,

 the squish, 

the explosions; 

let them burst: 

your tears, 

your kisses, 

your love, 

your creations. 

They must rupture out first. 

Let it all crumble, because you know when you put it all together exactly how you want this time, it will be ridiculously stunning. 

Ready for some support for how to stop your inner critic? Check out my current offerings below. 

Women's Wellness Experiences Summer 2024

Women’s Wellness Experiences in Portland, Oregon:

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Your Body As Poetry:

A low cost Mind-body connection monthly community gathering

Join Lumalia’s bi-monthly somatic journey, tailored for women and femme-identifying individuals, aimed at nurturing the mind-body connection.

Experience live online classes, accessible with replays, and engage in a supportive community.

Each session introduces new themes through beginner-friendly movement meditations—perfect for those who cherish dance and creative expression.

Ideal for anyone seeking community, movement, and a path to explore their creative self. Join Your Body As Poetry

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Self Awareness Roadmaps:

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Customized roadmaps that include self-improvement lessons, nervous system regulation classes (yoga and meditations), journal prompts, and experiences to deepend your awareness.

Begin with my self-awareness quiz to find your roadmap. Then set your calendar for times to continue your journey.

Self Care Personal Reconnection

30 Day Self Care Challenge:

A toe dip to self care with a spicy twist, because we don’t do basic around here.

If you love challenges, plans and showing up to your calendar to dos you’ll love this series. 

It includes daily journal prompts, yoga flows, quick pep talks and optional inspired “dates” to take yourself on.

Begin with 30 days of self care

Want more ideas for healing your inner child good girl?

I teach yoga nidra for healing, a pratice that helps you rewrite your subconscious while you rest. Check out the two classes I have here:

 

 

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About the Author

Lumalia standing near a coastline with her hair blowing in the wind

Hey, I’m Lumalia, the main voice behind Celebrate Again. I call myself a connection architect because I have a deep passion for guiding us all to fall back in love with life through states of beauty, but many of us are far from feeling at home in our own bodies, so we seek to find safety in others. 

Yikes, that’s scary, I know; I did that for three decades, too, until I returned home to myself.

I’m so excited to share with you all I’ve learned and this beautiful journey back home to what makes you absolutely stunning just because you are alive today.

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